decomposing

I like my head thick

Skull white 

and weighted

The thought

The temptation

Of bones relapsing 

to new places 

Of glass 

and gardens in vases

Falling

Splitting and bursting

And reflecting in the sun

Like how i know

who i am

The sound 

The soft pull

When wine hits the ground

When teeth wrap their tounge

And metal rises in throat

When you close 

And turn and turn

Or feel the pretty burn

Of blood on your lounges

And earth

Earth is alive

Always

Always

In you 

The aching wound

The rasping rash

Of too much

Or not enough

Takes me

Heals

And holds me

I cover myself 

With falling cherries

And wet petals

Until the bugs crawl back

Awakened in their trance

I am brought to life

To see

The decomposing 

The muddening 

Of my very own body

But i am already blooming

You see

I want you to believe 

I am in my prime

The right color and sound

Don't notice 

The colour pouring over the ground 

A slit in the stem

Its me not them

Patterns and petals unflolding 

No turning back

But please not this

Not this

Not this