◇☆ pause in synchronization ☆◇

I remember the ducks

synchronized

And I remember the snow like dewy pearls and blankets

And I saw then 

with less jugdement in my heart 

I felt better

And to just feel like a human

Not better or worse

Just a part 

Pure

Somewhat just living

Like all else

And to be one of the branches

Circling around the sun

Or the street lamps

Or the stars

And to hear the pebbles of rain

And singing of birds when I close my eyes 

To be freed from the strings and webs and sticky pulling threads

That keep us away from the full of nothing

Of just sitting and being and wondering and letting things sit and then letting go

Of nescesarry pause from the loud and red and industrial

☆ shells (we grew up old) ☆

World pulsing

And dreaming

Into the gleaming snow

The branches curl and fold

As the white cover our heads

Like hats and coats

And I need to be hugged

To be hugged by the world

The wild

We grew up old

Playing in the forest 

an art unknown

But then i had known

The truth held our hands and covered our backs 

like shells or waves

Blankets that kept us safe

Werther we knew it or not

We moved into the forest

The forest moved into us

And I cannot forget my call

Between bricks and metal and cold asphalt

And in these lonely streets

All roots and colours 

and sounds bleed out 

But the choice is not ours

The choice is not from the forest

And it seems

To do and to be

Some part of you is left behind

To do and to be

Some part of you is left to die

twisted necks

So much is felt

So much is said

I cannot untangle or cut

The cake that bakes

Somewhere in my chest

Thick and full of flesh

As a baby in the stroller

And everyone looks down the crib

With their twisted hanged necks

To change, explain and persuade

The infant and inferior, 

the shortlived

Caged to the bed or pressed to the chair

Its for your best, no fleeing here

But what some don't know

Is that at night

You've been walking alone

Through thickly dripping trees and fog

Through the wild and true and unseen

And opened yourself and taken off your face

And you learned to walk and talk their talk

But you will soon see

Mo matter what

Twisted necks and tall red eyes

keep spitting

bending

and looking down

the burning

And yes i have thought

The cut-clean and uncomplicated

And appearingly beautiful

Like castles and statues and gold

Are neat and pretty

But there's something else about

The way the sun curls itself

Into my lovers hair

And seeps through the window

Or the way he holds me

Like the colours of the day

Like the way ocean melts stone

And the mountain grows green beyond 

Sparkling and burning

With soul, sorrow and love

And theres somethings about the way

The world cuts itself

into the soil and rocks and us

and how it cuts and molds and cleaves

as leaves in all shades cover the ground

With colours of mint and forest and burning coal

And I am burning slowly as the world tears us down and wears us down

little by little

But let me be 

alive for now

For a speck of time

floating in the milkyway 

scattered across the sky

longing

In the night

Hungry and longing

Home

To my home

I feel an overwhelming cleanliness 

Like newly washed pillow cases

tears you let yourself weep 

and the cold morning breeze 

I am not so wrong off

I am not so lost

We are all

Just human

Just human

And I am not so lost

See, I have something so utterly untouchable in this world

Pure as snow 

And warm as a home

Sweeter than any herb or spice

honey or fruit

And as colourful as all corals and crystals 

and flowers in this world

Something that pulls like the ocean

So blue and full and flowing with emotion 

I have something that rises over the mountains and the trees

Holds me when i sleep

Something that moves my sun and my moon

I have the world 

And I have you

it looks so easy

Everything unpacked 

Open like a wound

I see through laced curtains

Bandages and foam

And everything isnt everything 

How is it so easy

I carry one heart too many

Sorry i cannot machine

It looks so easy

Dont you think

☆ In line ☆

Oh, to fit like a book in the shelf

That never wants to be opened

Like clothes folded at the bottomn of the closet

Like ducks at the pond, swimming in line

I wanted to be in line, folded, rectangular

Like a white house with white bars and white windows sills

I felt i was something strange and unpleasant

An animal in the zoo noone wanted to look at

A bacteria, a piece of mold, a stain

Something to get rid of

Something to discard

So i just wanted to be easy

Like most and to feel seen when i am only being watched

To be washed down to molecular parts only to be formed

to fit into the mold 

and to be cut 

by the cutter